Thursday, March 29, 2007

Revita-Yoga? More Likely a Revita-Rip Off

Not practicing yoga for a spell makes it pretty hard to come up with subject matter for a yoga blog. That stands to reason.

But just when I was about to throw my hands up, I happened upon this New York Times article:

Got Crow’s-Feet? Call the Downward Dog
Published: March 29, 2007
Revita-Yoga combines yoga and facial exercises and is billed as a way to combat frown lines, wrinkles and sagging.

Here’s a little excerpt:

“Want to sculpture and narrow your nose? Alternate breathing out of each nostril, Revita-Yoga teaches. Have crow’s-feet? Open the eyes wide to smooth the lines. As pale as the winter sky? A dose of downward dog can add color to the complexion while oxygenating the skin.”

OK. I’ve seen it all now. Let me just say this: yes, downward facing dog is great for getting a little color into your cheeks. Absolutely. But no amount of alternate nostril breathing is going to narrow my nose or any other nose on the planet. If that were the case, people would not be paying thousands of dollars to plastic surgeons for a more petite proboscis.

And opening the eyes wide to smooth crow’s feet? OK. For about a second. But then what do you do with the lines created in your forehead as a result of opening your eyes wide as saucers?

In the words of the outrageous Cindy Adams, “Only in New York, kids, only in New York.”

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