Tuesday, May 29, 2007

On the Bench

Folks, it's bad knee time again. Well, not bad, but not progressing. You know what that means: no yoga. Right when I likely need it the most. So...no yoga, no yoga blogs. Unless, of course, the kids do something really profound (I am still teaching them about every other week). I have to give my knees a rest in order to be able to complete my last yoga teacher training module in late June.

The only good thing that's come out of all this knee bulls*** is I've been hardcore on the upper body/ab workouts. The result? I'm getting at least three sets of five-to-seven pull ups. This coming from the girl who couldn't do a single unassisted pull up a couple months ago. I'm hoping by the end of summer, I can get three sets of ten. You'd think I just won the Pulitzer or something. Sure, it's trivial, but when your life is blowing up and you have some little victory, some progress, you're just elated. So, I'm hoping with all this upper body/core work, when I finally do get back to yoga, I can rock forearm balances and handstands. Away from the wall. One can dream, right?

Funny: the very things I've hated upon first attempt are the very things I most look forward to trying again and again. Because I've forced myself into the challenge. And it turns out I like it. (It feels like I've written this before. If I have, forgive me. It's just so surprising, all this "forcing" myself into uncomfortable situations. So not me. Well, used to not be me.)

No yoga sucks, it really does. I miss class, I miss Rachel from Cuba (even if I hardly know her...I love to hear her talk, and she's the other person in class—unfortunately for her—with bum knees, so we keep tabs on each other), and I miss, more than anything, my precious time with Dolly.

I'm not sure why I've been benched at this particular time in my life, but I suspect it might have something to do with the need for a slower pace and introspection. I've done a lot of soul searching the last six months—no doubt yoga has had an influence there. I've learned to be more in the present, and as such, I'm having to evaluate where I am each day on that day. Not a month in advance. See, you can't plan your practice a month a time when your knees are screwed up. Just when I thought it was safe to start adding classes to my calendar for June, the knees flare up, and, well, that's why when it comes to my calendar, I write in pencil.

So, I've got no choice but to just chill. Sit back and evaluate. Take stock. Be glad for what I have right here, right now. Worry about tomorrow when tomorrow comes. Know that it will work when it is supposed to.

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